Oh Goodie!

Less than a week to my bilateral total knee replacement and I'm reviewing the inter webs about information...
And I see this one...apparently my sex life will get better post-op. Hmm. Now I just need a partner...;-)

http://tarlowknee.com/category/total-knee-replacement/page/4/

Dr. Tarlow comments:  Common knowledge says successful joint replacement surgery improves life function and patient well being.  Less often addressed but of importance to patients is the effect joint replacement has on sexual intimacy.  Fortunately, good news is seen in this aspect of patient life after orthopedic surgical intervention.  Read on.

From the Daily Mail -U.K.

From  a report from  Rathod P, Deshmukh A, Ranawat A, Rodriguez J presented  at the 2013 Annual Meeting of the American Academy of Orthopaedic Surgeons (AAOS).

 Painful osteoarthritis of the hip or knee can reduce mobility and make normal activities like walking, exercising and yes, even sexual intimacy, a challenge.  New research evaluating the influence of total hip and total knee replacement on the physical and psychological aspects of sexuality found a majority of patients experienced reduced function before surgery. Fortunately, significant improvements were reported after total hip or total knee replacement surgery. 

Before surgery, 147 patients answered questionnaires for the study. Of them, 67% reported physical problems with sexual activity such as pain and stiffness, and a whopping 91% reported experiencing psychological issues, related to sexual self-image and general well- being.

Post-surgery, 116 participants responded to questionnaires and reported significant improvements in both physical and psychological issues impacting their sexual function. Ninety percent (90%) of patients reported improved overall sexual function after total hip or total knee replacement, with total hip replacement patients experiencing a higher rate of improvement.

The post-operative improvements reported were:

• Improvement in general well-being: 84%
• improved sexual self-image: 55%
• improvement in libido: 42%
• increased intercourse frequency: 41%
• increased intercourse duration: 36%

People considering total knee or total hip replacement surgery should talk to their surgeons about their current level of activity, and what they can expect for their post-surgery return to activity – in and out of the bedroom.

Numbness and by the way, will I notice sex ever again?

I'm sending out my book proposal for the MS and Intimacy book sometime next week. It's sort of funny, because right now the only intimacy I have is with my new adopted cat, who comes over and kneads me.

But all I can think of is the line from "The Truth about Cats and Dogs", where the vet is taking calls from the public on her radio show, and this guy calls in and says his cat likes to lick him and keeps doing it and he seems to have developed a rash (location unspecified). The vet, Janeane Garofalo, says, "You can love your pets, but remember you can't LOVE your pets."

Still, it's nice to be kneaded. As it were.

Meanwhile, numbness continues. If I weren't such a chicken I'd attempt cutting just to see if I'd feel that but heck, I'm in enough pain already, why go ask for more? Besides, the blood is messy.

I remember from my past intimate moments oh so very long ago that one of the fun things was that since so much of my body was numb, the spots that felt, felt EXTRA. It was like a treasure hunt. Nothing, nothing, nothing, WOW, nothing…Fun for play and exploration with a patient partner.

I also remember the summation principle -where the more I was touched, the more synapses would light up so that I could actually feel things, even if they didn't feel where they were touched, but elsewhere, so to speak. Like someone would stroke my arm and I'd feel that in my knees or something. Still felt wonderful. It was as if my partner was adding current to my fried wiring and after a certain point, the lights turned on.

Sometimes it's alarming for my partner, I think. There I am, la di da, yes this is nice, whatever. Did I shut off the stove? And then, kerplowie. Not necessarily THAT kerplowie, but fun anyway.

Anyway, since the cat, handsome as he is, does not have that effect, I'll simply have to remember what it was like for my book.

Memories are nice, too. mmmm.

A Helpful Book

As a youngish and dating woman with MS, one of the things that has filled me with the most despair over the past several years is my loss of sensation in the...ahem...sexual areas. I consulted with my docs, whose recommendation was to place a bag of frozen peas over the...ahem...area in question and that that would help me feel increased sensation.
Well, I dunno about you guys, but frozen anything DOWN there doesn't sound too enchanting for me or the fellah involved. As one friend said, it's like going swimming in the Atlantic Ocean - cold at first, but okay once you're in...
Yikes.
Now, other than developing a jaundiced eye whenever I see a bag of frozen peas in the market, I haven't had much success with that advice. A friend of mine (who works with people with disabilities and their sexual health) and I got to talking. What if we combined the power of her knowledge of everything sexual and battery operated, and my nursing knowledge and the experience of someone living with MS, and we put together a helpful book?
Not a deadly boring one, but a light, useful one, with advice and drawings and some laughter and fun. That. we figured, could be a help to other people like me.
After all, MS is being diagnosed earlier and earlier, and it sounds gruesome to be sentenced to years and years without any idea of how to have a rewarding sex life. We deserve one, no?

But maybe that isn't what's needed. So we thought we'd ask you. In a short little survey, with no chance we can identify you, compiled on machines somewhere in the deep dungeons of the internet, impossible to trace. Well, maybe not completely impossible to trace, but I've got better things to do than find you. There are all those other frozen veggies to experiment with...

Here's the Blurb:

Dorothyanne Brown, a person with MS, nurse, and epidemiologist, and her
writing partner Karen Kalinowski, a Natural Health Consultant and Sex and Kink Awareness Educator, are collaborating to create a resource for people with MS and their partners about sexual intimacy. 

We've created a short survey, ten questions, to get a feeling for what your
needs are as a person with MS or a partner of a person with MS.

The survey is completely anonymous. We have no way to figure out who answers
it, we plan no cross linkage to any database or physician services. 

It will help us create a resource that will be most useful to you. 

Just click on this link and you will be taken to the survey:
http://www.surveymonkey.com/s/LSLN9XN

Please share widely with others with MS or their partners. Help us create a resource that will work for you.
Questions? respond here or email msandintimacy@gmail.com
And thanks!